Arn @ the Dept of Foreign Affairs

I had my passport renewed for my botched onshore assignment. I’m not a big fan of government agencies as they all have the same long boring lines, poorly implemented system, manual processes and hundreds and hundreds of people.

Here are some random thoughts while at the DFA:

- As always, there are fixers everywhere! There’s an amazing booth outside the DFA that will “inspect” your photo and will come up with something that makes it unacceptable (and therefore you have to take your picture there).

- The instructions for renewing your passport is posted outside: “Proceed to the DFA basketball court and fall in line”. Basketball court? So you have to shoot some free throws to get your passport renewed? Make 1 out of 5 and get it 2 weeks later? Make 5 out of 5 and you’ll get it tomorrow? Make a shot from half court and you get a green card? Weird.

- The dude at the “data inspection” counter amazed me. He got my papers, typed something on the computer, stamped it then signed it… all without looking at my documents and without looking at the screen while talking to the girl at the other counter (who was doing the same thing). Wow!

- The passport claim area shows us the type of system these guys have. We have a window for all last names ending with “A”, another for “B”, for “C”, “D”, “E” “F” and “G” were in one window, well, you get the idea. “M” had its own window. “W” “X” “Y” and “Z” were all in the last window. Based on that, we all know how this was supposed to work right?

… and my passport came out of the “C” window. Genius.

- Here’s the funniest thing that happened that morning – all the people there had the same claim forms since we were all there just for one reason… (and that’s why they called it the “passport claiming area”)… Anyways, all the people fell in line and submitted our claim forms then we wait for our name to be called in an area 10 feet away from the counters. One annoyed employee picked up one of the forms, raised it up and asked sternly “Kanino ito?”

People were quiet. I was chuckling.

“KANINO ITO? DI KO MABASA YUNG SULAT.”

Look dude, if you can’t read it from 5 inches from your face, how can we at 10 feet? People started laughing. The poor dude was embarrassed.

Well, I got my passport now. Next stop…

Secret :)